Masarap gumala.

Nakakatawa 'tong emote emote ko ngayon. Walang dangal.

Nitong mga nakalipas na araw, kapag walang pasok, ibig sabihin tuwing Biyernes at Linggo, lumalabas ako ng bahay para gumala. As in gala. Punta sa mga lugar na pinupuntahan ko dati nung hindi pa ako nagtatrabaho: mall, kainan, bilihan ng libro, kalye, lumang mga pasyalan. Maynila lang siyempre, para malapit sa bahay at hindi gastos sa pamasahe. Nakakamiss din pala. Umuulan na kasi e, kaya tinitiis kong umalis ng hapon kahit sobrang init. Ayokong maabutan ng ulan masyado. Ayokong nagpapayong.

Sta. Cruz madalas. Dun lang naman ako tambay dati. Ongpin nung nakaraang linggo. Quiapo minsan. Ma Mon Luk kanina. Avenida ang laging lakaran. Naligaw ako nung dumaan ako ng Ongpin, as usual, kakalingon sa mga Tsinoy na dumadaan, baka may masagap na tsismis, o may masarap tingnan. Pero cool lang naman. Pag naligaw ka naman sa Ongpin, sa Avenida ka rin naman lalabas, kaya walang kaso. May libreng kuwento ka pa courtesy of the tambays. May nadaanan ako, nagsisigawan sila tungkol sa kantutan. Ang saya. Medyo magastos nga lang gumala, pero okay lang naman. Hindi naman madadala ang pera sa hukay.

Naisip kong magsimba pero pumasok lang ako para tingnan yung mga disenyo ng simbahan. Paborito kong gawin yun. Para ngang kabisado ko na yung architecture ng simbahan ng Sta. Cruz. Maganda lang sila tingnan. Parang tinutukso ka ng kasaysayan. Pampalipas oras din.

At wag ka, minsang naglalakad ako at nagmumuni-muni sa isang crush, kamukat-mukat mong nakita ko ang pangalan ni crush sa isang gusali! Akalain mo. Maka-timing nga naman. Kumikinang-kinang pa. Wala lang. Pang-asar ang kapalaran. Ewan ko ba. O siya. Minsan na nga lang ako magka-crush ng attainable, hindi ko pa ma-attain! (bawal magbigay ng clue)

Labo. Drama nitong tumutugtog ngayon. With matching violin pa. Pero digs naman, buhay. Makatili naman 'tong si Regine. Parang walang Ogie.



Pangarap Ko Ang Ibigin Ka - Regine Velasquez

Something I found.

Okay, so conversations kept me alive. And there it was. Not too long ago. But seemed too far out. Come to think of it, 'fantastic' was never a word I often used. I went on to read the site.


This is the part when I miss you. Whatever 'miss' means. Whatever 'longing' means. Or is this just a chemical reaction? Hormones? Intervention of the mighty mirthless?



Just your name and mine, together, linked by 'and' makes me a little comfortable. This one only becomes a memory, of a virtual companionship I sorely miss.



A Dream Goes On Forever - Todd Rundgren

Runaway.

Not same time last year but almost the same feeling. Me waking up when "While you wait for the others" was playing and tears started to well up. Then it just didn't stop.

Now it's this. Matt closes his eyes so tight he seems to be making another song while singing. There goes what makes you think Im enjoyin' being led to the flood? and I'm on my knees.

When I look back I will always remember what I'm feeling right now, who I'm having this feeling for, and why.





Brian Eno - MGMT

Hang the DJ Vol. 2! Summer Ish!

CLICK AWAY!

This Tornado Loves You - Neko Case

Pagtataka.

Kapag ginoogle mo ang Google, hindi ba nakakatakot yung ideya na lalabas ang Google? Na parang hinanap niya yung sarili at nakita niya ka'gad? Fraction of a second. Walang effort.

Wala lang. Natakot ako, at nagnais na sana Google din ako. Madaling matagpuan ang ilang bagay, kabilang na ang sarili.



Please Send Me Someone to Love - Sade

So far around the bend.

Of all the followup albums I expected to wow me (the new MGMT I'm still figuring out; the new LCD I haven't downloaded yet in full but listened to a couple of times; the new Foals is good and I'm sure I'll like it more if I stop listening to it everyday; the new Watson Twins is a bit average), only these two did:

The Monitor - Titus Andronicus. War mode. Binging on beer vocals (wtf), it seems to be some sort of celebration of craziness. Middle is kinda reflective, but the hooks, The enemy is everywhere for instance, stick. It's growing and growing on me, and sometimes I have these thoughts that I used to be a war veteran.

High Violet - The National. Gulay. Talking about anticipation that pays off. A lot of talk going on about how terrible Terrible Love is in the album, and crap, that performance on Jimmy Fallon is truly way better, but give up guys, that's how live sets go. Unpredictable. Still, this one sounds so amazing it feels like the end of the year already. Loop, loop, loop. Days of static as usual.


Conversation 16 - The National

A Midsummer's Night.

Stupid things crack me up, and one of them just did. What always happens, like a curse when I take a leave on purpose, on selfish purpose, is that it works against me. I get a rest, I get to sleep longer, I forget about my insomnia. So amid the heat I'm home doing something else, thinking of something else, wishing something else. Then something will happen, something least likely to happen happens, and then war. Just like that. Lets me think of karma, which I believe; lets me think of punishment, which I also believe. Why then this happens? I'm at fault for sure, as I am always at fault just by not doing anything. It feels shitty that's all. You say words you mean but you regret saying; the point being not the words you said but the fact you said them, in such context. We didn't grow up in apologies, nor we can learn it now. It depresses me to be awake every turn of the night, thinking, another day passes and I am still awake to witness it, to feel it, to deject myself.

"Isn't it dumb? All over the world, people running around, trying not to die? Hanging on to life like grim death. And I want to die. And I can't." - Element Girl, Sandman #20

So true she got there.


One Touch - LCD Soundsystem

Para sa ating lahat, walang takas.

Nakaw mula sa "Soltero" ni Ginoong Pio de Castro III

Odessa - Caribou

Destroy Those Irritating Memories

Minsan masarap lang maging sweater. O sige na nga, maski sumbrero na lang. Panood ng pelikula!


La Collectionneuse - Charlotte Gainsbourg

This is happening.

Tonight, I'm streaming the new LCD album before it gets released in May!



Six tracks later. . . the Firefox crashes. Whatever happened to fun. Huhu xxxxx

When I get back, the Internet connection is wavering, making the stream skip. Huhu xxxxx

Close everything xxxxxx

Anyway, in other news, only now I get the chance to check Phoenix's website for a free download of their concert in Sydney!

Internet, you bitch, don't spoil my dayoff.

First time album streaming is fun, yeah yeah yeahs.

Fifteen what-the-fucks later, streaming is going seaaamlesssssss. Fingers crossssseeedd. Megan is streaming with me, which makes it more fun. Glee glee glee.



I Can Change - LCD Soundsystem

A most pleasant surprise.

I wasn't there but my absence gave me something else. Thank you Ayn! Means a lot. Boo! to me, as always.

The Modern Age - The Strokes

TPC.

New album. Anticipating.

More To Lose - Seona Dancing

Inutella.

Bakasyon at wala akong inatupag kundi pumapak ng Nutella. Maraming gustong gawin pero wala na atang mas nakakatamad pa sa gitna ng init, na maski paggalaw lang ay nakakaubos na ng lakas, tipong nagasta na lahat ng kinain ko sa pananghalian e ayoko pa ring kumilos. Nakakatamad maligo, magbasa, magcharge ng cellphone, magbukas ng computer! Magsulat! Wala. Walang silbi ang bakasyon bukod sa pagtungaga at paghintay sa araw ng trabaho na ayaw mo kailanman dumating.


Tokyo Storm Warning - Elvis Costello