Eclipse.

“As long as we were in love, we understood each other. There was nothing to understand.”

L'Eclisse (1962)

Happy was the night.

SuJu-Dr.Who-Buffy-sing-along night, as expected, was a blast. Again, that wallpaper was the loveliest I've seen. And these friends are the most fun to be with. And at 6 A.M. we're not even close to tipsy.

RIP Iya Day 40.

On my birthday I cried because of how things have been. Realizing the things I no longer have, the memories I can only share, and the beloved I can no longer be with. I dread the remaining days of my life. I relish what's left. I care less about my dreams now. In fact, I care nothing.

Iya promised me once that she would read all my owned books when she grew up. Who would re-read them now? Who would devour them as much as I did? How could I ever wish someone would take her place, knowing no one else could and would?

It's been forty days. The pain never goes away. Sadness piles upon sadness, grief upon grief. Everything now is dedicated to a Happier Year, a year we can only remember but not have.